


Transforming

by d3anx



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-21
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-03-25 03:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3795730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d3anx/pseuds/d3anx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam is a sophmore in high school going through everyday problems pus ones unique to queer people.His friends also face these struggles</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. -1-

The binder on my chest makes the beating of my heart even harder to not notice. Every Beat makes my heart jump and no amount of tea could calm it. Today was my first day at my school as a male. I was Born Veronica Crystal-Phan. My older half brother was 17 when i was born so I dont remember much of him from my childhood. My younger sister Chelsea is my paternal twin.Im normally super upbeat and loveable but gender dysphoria is kicking me right where it hurts  
"Adam, its almost time for school, are you ready?" my mom shouts from the bottom of the stairs.  
"Almost, I just need to find my shirt," I said, standing at my mirror and wondering if i passed enough; my hair was cut short and was pompadoured up, my small boobs where binded into nothingness. My arms had been toned up so you could see my muscles, I contoured my face to be more masculine, my muscle shirt covered the thick straps of my binder but some of the actual binding part was visible. My skinny jeans showed off my legs and butt, those are pretty androgynous looking since lots of guys have cute butts,My black vans where slightly worn out already cause i didnt want to be breaking them in the first week of school.I took a deep breath and decide i pass enough so that people i didnt know called me he.The people who already knew me and the teachers got an email saying  
"Hello Matthew M. Dumphy High Students and Parents,  
My Son Adam previously went to your school under the name Veronica and as female.He is in transition and will not tolerate being called female pronouns or Veronica.He is a young boy so this also means allowing him to use male bathrooms and locker rooms.His sports career that began last year on the girls hockey team will not contine until he is on T so he play boys hockey.  
Sincerely Amy Crystal" I'm not a big fan of the hockey decision but my mom says it's best  
I run down the stair ate my bowl of froot loops,took my hormone blockers and then brushed my teeth.My sister and mom are waiting in the parlor.My sister is wearing a dress and flats like her girly self.  
"Finally your here,What took you so long?"My sister asked  
"Its hard to find a black shirt in a pile of other black shirts"I lie,I set my clothes out every morning making sure i have clean "Boy" clothes.  
"Can we just get to school?don't want to be late on the first day."  
"Okay"We said in unison grabbing our bags off of the couch  
We drive the 10 minutes it takes to get to my high-school.The old brick building stands 5 stories tall,The bell tower was ringing loudly like it does at the beginning of each semester.I got out of the car and walking on the pavement to the main entrance.I went up to my homeroom in room 320 on the third floor since the first number is the floor number.I walk into Miss Fifer's room and take a seat second column third row, putting my bag on the desk  
"I think that's the tranny" Says some tall football player type boy in the back of the classroom  
"Damn that nigga is feminine"Responds his friend loudly  
I audibly sigh and roll my eyes.  
"Guess IT doesn't like being told that"The first one uttered  
"Yeah SHE must hate that"His friend responds  
I calmly get up from my seat and went over to them  
"You want something?"They say scowling  
"You two just called me an it and she,Im a boy,i am a he."I say calmly making sure not to beat the shit out of them  
"We can call you whatever you want,What is your mommy gonna send us a sternly worded letter"The taller one says  
"No but my sister will leak the unsolicited dick pic you sent her friend Meghan"I say walking away and going back to my seat.I didnt actually know if this was true but both Megan and Mehgan where my sisters friend and together they had been sent just about every popular guys dick pics.  
My friend Dye whos a year ahead of walks in.She has dark red hair, black lipstick all black clothing and a look of disdain letting people know she was not to be messed with.This is ruined however when she sees me.She runs towards me smiling and giving me a big hug.She sits down in front of me and starts talking about what's happened since the last time i saw her on my birthday like a month ago.  
"Me and Bella went to see Avengers Infinity war Part 2,It was good I absolutely love Scarlett Johanson as black widow"  
"Me too,I also like that she got Steve and Bucky together a few movies ago"  
"in i think it was the Civil war movie?"  
"Yeah, it was"  
"So how are things between you and Stacey"  
"Non-existent,She said she would never date a trans dude"  
"Aww,My poor baby,its okay you'll find someone"  
"Class quiet down,I want to give you all your schedules"Miss Fifer says  
She hands them out column by column giving the person in the front everyones schedule for that column.I got mine and checked over it with Dye  
"Okay we have gym and Band together"I say to her  
"Well that's good"  
"Okay now to take attendance, Matt B" the teacher starts attendnce  
"Here"says the taller football player from before  
"Ethan C"  
"Here"Says the person who im assuming was Ethan,He must be new.  
"V... i mean Adam C."  
"Here" I stutter out  
She goes down the list and everyone but two people where here.  
The bell rings and i go to my first class which was on the 4th floor.I climb up the steep stairs and get to my school's 4th floor which is only half a floor with windows all the way along the western wall.The sun came in the windows and made the otherwise bland school come to life.I walked to my geometry class and sat as far away from the teachers desk but also still far away enough from the kids who are just plain bad.I've never been good at math but i never gave the teacher as much trouble as some of the other students.The teacher is Ms. Dunkin,She is young or at least looks young but she had already been through a divorce.She was one of the prettier teachers at my school so of course some of the guys were really pervy about her.She walked to the front of the class room and wrote "Geometry" on the board in her fancy cursive handwriting.  
"Who can tell me why geometry was invented"She asks.  
"To mesure the earth"This girl named Rowena answers.She has long brown hair and light tan skin  
"Correct,Now what is it used for today"  
"Buildings so they have proper support"I say when i get called on  
"Or for fitting things together" rowena when she gets called on again  
"Good,Now that i know at least two of you are paying attention,What are the sums of all the angles of a triangle"  
"180"  
"A square"  
"360"  
"Decagon"  
"1 thousand ...440" Rowena answered all of them  
"Impressive "Says Ms. Dunkin  
"Thanks"  
"Anyway here are the lists of what you need"Says the teacher handing out half sheets of paper with typing on it  
The list is short it was just a notebook,a folder and a basic calculator.  
I am slightly more than aquantinces with Rowena so i go over to her taking the seat next to her.  
"Hey,So are you doing cheerleading this year"I say she wasnt the head cheerleader but she wasnt at the bottom of the pyramid either.  
"No,I decided i didnt really like it that much,so your still doing hockey?"  
"No but,i cant wait for october so the season can start"  
"Me too,I hope Quia does good this year"  
"Oh yeah i forgot you're Quia's sister"  
"The other cheerleaders didnt like me really telling people"  
"Well they suck"  
"And in more than one way"She smirked  
I just laugh my still very feminine laugh and smile  
"So do you mind if i ask about your transistion?"  
"What do you wanna know"  
"if its like painful"  
"If i bind too long it is"  
"What's binding?"  
"You see this thing?"I say moving my shirt to show my binder  
"Mhmm"  
"Well it like... compresses your boobs"  
"Ohh yeah that sounds painful"She says looking at me then her boobs  
"For you it probobly would be"I say since she does have like a D cup that was B last year  
"Are you flirting with me adam?"  
"No,no,no like boobs arent even that sexual to me"I say panicked .She is pretty and nice and smart but its not like she would ever go for me even if i did like her  
"Oh. okay well thats good cause i'm really liking this senior at the moment "  
"Good for you"  
"Yeah he's supposed to be taking me out for coffee today after school"  
"Where, go out for coffee after school , i want to make sure i dont run into you guys cause if this works well i want to be suprised if i meet him"  
"Why do you think you would meet him"  
"Cause we are friends now,right"I say putting my hand out for a high five  
" friends"She said solidly high fiving me back  
"So where are you going"  
"Well to Mary Lou's then he's gonna drive me home"  
"Mary Lou's the coffee eqivelent of hooters,seems like a bad sign"  
"Hey! they have good coffee, and its not like hooters you only have to be 16"  
"Okay your right,He must just really like coffee"  
"So any special little ladies or lads in your life she changes the subject  
"Kinda"  
"What did they do?"  
"From the beggining?"  
"We have plenty of time"  
"I met her at my birthday party as someones +1,She kissed me at the end of the night and gave me her number,a week later she found out i was trans and called me just a stupid dyke"  
"She's not a very good person then,I know its hard to stop loving someone but if they make you feel worthless than its not worth it"  
"Is that why you broke up with Phil?"  
"Yup,He and the cheerleading team forced me into anorexia"She says scratching off her purple nail polish.  
"You'll be okay,Ill make sure no guys mess with you or they get the boot" I say rubbing her shoulder  
"Thanks"She said smiling up at me.  
"Its the least a good person should do"  
She takes out a YA romance novel type book (that i coincidentily had read) and starts reading it  
"Well i guess i should go now"  
"No stay,I like the energy you give off,It's very positive and nice"  
"Oh okay,I like that book by the way"I said  
She just gave a smile and continued reading.She has fascinating facial expressions reading it.You could tell when she gets to what she deemed a romantic part because she will smile and give a tiny giggle.When the wording was awkward she will furrow her eyebrows and reread over it mouthing the words and then thinking for a second while looking at the ceiling or out the window.She seems so much more interesting than last year,back then she was just the quiet cheerleader who dated the left tackle on the football team and was always silently by his side.Now she is full of life and has a twinkle in her eyes.  
I am daydreaming about nothing really just random observations,when the bell rang dismissing me from class.It takes me a while to get recombobulated but Rowena still wait towards the front of the class room for me so we could go to our next class together.  
"American history?"She asks im assuming she was asking my next class  
"Yup"  
"Good,"  
We walk down the crowded stairwell and to the left a few meters until we got to Miss Fifer's room.We sit in the second row next to each other and put our bags underneath the desks.Miss fifer is a hardcore feminist and actually majored in womens studies not world studies when she was in college.  
"So class,i know american history can be boring,so today you just have to take this short baseline assesment and then you have the whole class to yourself"  
She handed out the assesment which was only a page long  
1Who is George washington?  
2.What number president was theodore rosevelt?  
3.When was the civil war's tenth aniversary?  
4..Was our state one of the thirteen colonies?  
5.Who is America named after  
That was all the paper said yet I only knew the answer to two questions. 1.The first president of united states, 4.Yes.After everyone finished I asked if I could go to the library for some peace and quiet so I could read.  
"Sure but bring her "she said pointing to Rowena.  
"Okay"  
We walked to the library on the second floor and went to the V.I.P section Aka a few bean bags and a table in case someone was doing research using multiple books.She sat down across from me and started reading her book while I grabbed mine out of my bag.It was "The book theif" since it was my favorite book,I have read it like 5 times.All of the german words where translated above in blue pen with my shakey handwriting.  
"Hey,Thanks for getting us in here"She whispered when i looked up from my book after hearing a weird bird noise.Wheather she could imitate a bird or looked up to was yet to be tetermined  
"No problem my mom is the librarian so its not hard"  
"Oh,Id like to get to know your mom better than just Mrs. Crystal"  
"Another time you can,She doesnt really like talking"  
"Ohh"She said looking back at her book  
We read in silence with our feet sometimes touching but not in an awkward way.The bell rang and we checked our scedules  
"English with Mr. Magret"I asked,he was the AP english teacher  
"You know it"She said  
"Let's go"I said getting off the floor and helping her up with my arm out since i assume she was still recovering a little from how weak anorexia makes you  
We walked up the crowded stairs which was even worse than going down.We walked into the room and where bombarded by how pretty his room was.The book self's where color coordinated and the walls where an almost poetic soft teal color.Mr Magret was a rather young man who dressed nicely but wasnt intimidating with his slighly messy hair and scruffy beard.When the bell rang he went to the front of the classroom and leaned agaist the board.  
"Who can raise there hand tell me their favorite book?"He asked the class  
"The great gatsby"Said a voice at the back of the room  
"Alices Adventures in wonderland"  
"The book theif" I said when i was called.A few more well known books with on screen adaptations where said  
"Who can give me one that does not have a movie  
"Catcher in the rye"Said a pretentious boy  
"Geek Magnet"Said Rowena when she was called  
"I'm afraid i dont know that book"  
"It's a book by Keiran Scott that i first read in 6th grade,This year i was going through my books and i reread it,Its not exactly the best book in the world linguistically but i really like the message"  
"That's sweet,The best books dont have to be super wordy"The teacher said  
"Exactly"She said  
"How many of you do writing on an at least weekly basis"  
Rowena was the only one who raised her hand  
"How long have you been writing"  
"A few month's its mainly really insigifigant stuff,Blurbs and peoems"  
"Every good writer starts somewhere"  
"Thanks"I noticed that she said thanks alot which is a good sign she never takes anything for granted  
The rest of english class was SSR(Singular Silent Reading),Most of the class read books they had borrowed from the teachers bookshelf.The bell rung and i walked out of the classroom.I feel a large body walk by and push me to the ground.  
To be continued  
AN:The tense is a little weird but its supposed to be present tense


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adam deals with his attacker

I hit the ground falling on my hands.Some first year almost stepped on it before they realized i was there.  
"Hey faggot, at least try to get up"Said a voice i would recognize anywhere,It was Justin the football quarterback  
"What do you want?" I say starting to get up  
"Are you trying to get a little to friendly with Phil's girl"  
"No, and her name is Rowena not Phil's girl,they arent even together"I managed to get out with my heart beating a mile a minute.Justin started punching me in the face.I tasted blood then blacked out  
I woke up in the nurses office with Rowena by my side holding my hand and Dye siiting in a chair next to her.  
"What happened"  
"You got beat up,not that badly but you did either faint or get knocked out"  
"Am i concust"I asked  
"They dont think so"Said Dye  
"Well thats good"  
" it is,Well our class has lunch right now,do you want to eat then go up together"Said Rowena  
"Sure"  
Rowena sat with me eating her special meal from home she was ordered to eat by the hospital.It was alot of veggies and healthy fats.I ate my responsibly sourced vegitarian lunch from home,since im on hormone blockers i need to be careful not to eat any meat thats treated with horemones so i just decided to go vegitarian and i cant have eggs or milk from hormone treated animals so i have to go to this tiny dairy farm outside of town for my milk and they have some chickens so i also get y eggs there as far as like premade stuff i can have some dairy from hormone treated cows or chickens and most of the stuff I eat is like that free of like everything stuff.When we finished we went up the one set of stairs to the bio lab very slowly.When we got there we sat at the closest table.The teacher Mr. Dae just went over a powerpoint of the curiculum.  
I had chinese class last period of the day.Last year i chose it as my foreign language which was both good and bad.I can read pinyin fine and i have good pronunciation but i cant read the characters to save my life.Mr. Quin was really nice and always had characters and pinyin translations.  
I got into my mom's car and we waited for my sister  
"So we heard about the fight"Said my sister and mom  
"Why did it start"My sister asked  
"Some guy got jelous that im friends with his ex so he sent one of his friends after me"  
"That is low"My sister responded  
"Yeah but what am i supposed to do"  
"Just be the bigger man,Manhood and Womenhood isnt abot what's between your legs its about not being childish and paying your own dues"Said my mom  
"What mom said"  
We stopped by the drug store to visit my dad who was a pharmasist.Afternoons where pretty boring so we always checked on him.We walked down the hair dye isle to get to my dad's counter  
"Hey Jack"  
"Yes"  
"How has work been?"  
"Kinda boring ive mainly been filing perscriptions from the minute clinic"  
"Well those are always easy"  
"So how where the kids first days of school"  
"Well Chelsea had an amazing day and Adam got in a minor fight"  
"Was it his fault,was it a hate crime"  
"Hate crime im afraid but he only got a cut on his lip and a small bruise nothing on his arms or legs or torso"  
"He should be okay,and it kinda makes him look tough"  
"Thanks dad"I said  
"Well you should get back to work the senior citizens rush is coming"Said my sister  
"Bye"My dad said  
We walked back down the hair dye isle  
"Mom"Me and my sister just so happened to say at the same time  
"Can i go lighter?"My sister said pointing at her lightened medium brown loose curls with about an inch of dark regrowth  
"Can i go bluer?"I asked pointing to my brown natural hair with some lighter pieces mixed in  
"Yes and yes"My mother answered  
She grabbed one of those slightly higher end honey blonde hair dye, and some dark blue semi permenent dye.She used to dye her hair alot when she was younger so we trusted her  
"Good for both of you"My mom asked  
"Yup"We said in unison  
We went to the counter and payed.The ride home was short so we didnt even bother turning the radio on.The car pulled into the driveway and we got into the house  
"Okay we are dying your guys hair after supper"  
"Got it"  
I went up to my room and practiced my bass guitar.I'd been playing since i was 12 and i practice an hour a day 5 times a week 9 months a year (Not exactly this always sometimes ill during during the three month break so i don't get rusty)so i was pretty good.During the summer months i played an acoustic guitar since we always went to alot of fires during the summer.Today i played 2 hours learning (insert old misfits song) by the misfits,I was a casual fan of them because if i was a real fan i would have to learn at least some of the members names and i don't have that much patience.I also read a few chapters of the book thief.  
"Adam,get down here"My dad said.  
"In a minute"I said putting my my book down and putting a scrap of paper on the page i left off at.It had been about 8 hours so i had to take off my binder or i would get hurt.I changed into a really loose t shirt so you couldn't tell i had boobs.  
"Hurry up"My sister yelled  
"Ill be down in a second" i said running down the stairs holding my boobs so they didn't double hurt when i bind tomorrow.  
I got my food which was just a bunch of vegetables and some pasta.I actually liked this type of food alot ever since i was little.  
'"We're going over to fred's house on Friday"My mom said.It was tuesday so it was in 3 days.  
"Oh cool,We rarely ever get to see him"My sister said  
"Yeah,He'll be so happy about having a little brother now"I said  
"OH he defiantly will"My dad said  
We finished eating and then we got ready to get our hair dyed  
"Who's going first?"  
"Me"my sister said  
While her dye was setting in my mom put the blue hair dye in my hair.Some of it got on my ears and forehead so they where gonna be blue for a liitle bit.My sister washed her's out and used a toning conditioner so she wasnt a ginger.Her hair looked so much better now since her roots where.It looked slightly dry but nothing too bad.I let mine stand in for about another 40 minutes since semi permenent dye is really conditioning and the longer it sits in the better the color.I got into the shower and washed it out being careful not to get any run off on my body.The sun lightened peices of my hair looked really blue and the rest of my hair was like a midnight black color.I put on some PJ's,Listened to some music and watched some youtube on my phone.I went to sleep and dreamed only happy dreams.  
"WAKE ME UP! wake me up inside" my alarm clock sounded.i had it set to that song because it always did a good job at getting me to wake up since its so loud.I got up took my shirt off put by binder on,put on a shirt,took off my pajama pants(I wear boxers underneath cause im weird),Put on some pants,Questioned if i should find something to pack with,decided yes since you can see my crotch area cause my shirts not long enough,found some socks,decided to use some ankle socks,packed,zipped my pants,put on some socks,put on sneakers, and then walked down stairs.  
"Hey mom"  
"Hey son"  
"Hey bro"  
"Hey cis'I said she would never know if i aid sis or cis  
"Can we stop by dunkin donuts on the way to school instead of eating here"I asked  
"Sure"My mom said  
"Yeah i kinda want to bring coffee to school so other people are jelous"My sister says  
We got into the car,drove to dunkin donuts then went to the drive thru  
"Welcome to dunkin donuts how may i help you"  
" medium Soy lattte carmel no sugar, large Hot tea 2 sugars,and medium mocha coffee no sugar,and three glazed chocolate "My mom repeated off our order  
"Is that all"  
"Yessury"  
"That will be 8.25 at the window "  
We drove up paid and got our food.We ate our donuts and started drinking our coffee's.The school was a few feet away so we get out of the car and walked the rest of the way while my mom parked.  
My first class was band so i had it with Dye.Dye and I entered the auditourium together and sat in the first row of auditourium.Mr Borden walked in.He'sfamous axe murderer lizzie borden's like 2nd cousin twice removed or something.He was pretty cool i guess.The first day was just assigning instruments and seeing who has their own.I was gonna play my bass since i was in the jazz band.Dye was playing drums in the jazz band because she was really good.Our saxaphone player was this girl Gina,Our trombones where Will and Ylan,our trumpet was this guy named Zee or at least thats what he told us i dont really believe him. The rest of the band was the marching band so alot of flutes and clarinets and snare drums.  
I treked the stairs up to the fourth floor from the basement.Rowena was sitting in her seat writing something down and there was an empty seat next to her.I went over to the seat and sat in it.  
"Hey"  
"Ohh hi i didnt notice you sit down,how do you feel"  
"Better plus i got cool new hair so even if i feel bad i look good"I said pointing at my hair and doing one of those snap two finger point things.She burst out laughing at me like a full body laugh.We waite for the bell to ring and class to start  
"Uhh that's my seat" said some rude guy  
"We dont have assigned seats in this class you can go sit next to Hector or sometong"Said Ms dunkin from behind us  
"But he eats paper and glue"  
"Then find another seat no one is sitting in"  
"Fine"  
Class started and we worked on rotations and translations.It was mostly teacher instruction and then a worksheet you could ask your neighbors for help with.Class ended and i went downstairs to history.Me and Rowena sat next to each other again.We started learning about slavery and how cruel it was,Miss fifer was very fiesty about everything she did,when kids laughed or grinned at the lesson she just gave them a death stare that penetrate the soul.I had phs ed next which Rowena just so happened to also have so we walked down together.I went into the disgusting boys locker room and was hit with the hard stench of man sweat and axe body spray.  
There where no stalls so there where also half naked dudes everywhere.It was the firs day so luckily and unluckily only the super jocks changed.I put my bag in a locker and put a lock on it  
"What do we have here,Boys" said matt  
"That faggot i beat up yesterday"Said Justin  
"So this is the guy"Said Phil  
I just walked into the gym and sat on the bleachers next to Dye and Rowena who where already chatting together  
"What do you mean destiel was unrealistic did you not see the seasons bulid up to that kiss"Said dye  
"I did but im saying the setting was unrealistic,If i was about to die i wouldnt have the energy to do that passionate of a kiss"Replid Rowenaal  
"Adam what do you think?"Asked dye  
"I dont know,i dont watch that show"  
"Well then youre no help"Said Dye  
"So,this is your new crew,Some lesbians"Said justin coming up behind us with Matt aand Phil  
"No, Justin ,Adam is a boy" Rowena says  
"If that's a boy then i'm a donkey"Said matt  
"But Matt you are an ass"Says Dye.Matt was at a loss for words and he just whispered something under his breath  
"Wendy, Babe why did you break up with me"Phil said to Rowena  
"Don't call me that! My name is Rowena only my friends get to call me Wendy or Roe,and i broke up with you because i caught you fucking Jezzabelle"  
"It didnt mean anything,I didnt even like her"  
"Really you just stick your dick into any girl who's not in the hospital"  
"I missed you"He said  
"I was in the hospital recovering after I passed out from being bulemic"  
"You where being selfish it's not like I was gonna get anywhere with you"  
"You are so fucking disrespectful" I say to phil.  
"This has nothing to do with you tranny"  
"She is my friend, now if you have nothing good to say you and your pose just leave"  
"Make us!"He says  
"No I'm not gonna be violent"  
"I knew it, you're too much of a girl to fight like a man"  
"No I'm being the bigger man, but if being mature about this makes me a girl than I'm fine being girly"  
"Fine boys, let's leave Veronica is being such a bitch"  
It took every fiber of my being to stay cool on the outside.  
"Rude!"said Dye  
"Adam are you okay?"Asked Rowena  
"No, but he's just some stupid jock what do I expect"  
To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adam goes on a date

The rest of gym is uneventful. We have lunch at the end.Me and Roe (She said I could call her that somethimes) eat our home lunches while Dye and her GF Bella ate pizza from the caf.Lunch is always really rushed so we dont talk alot.I have Chinese last. Mr Quin teaches us Animals like the really specific names.  
I exit the school and see Rowena walking to a car with some older guy holding his hand.It's probably the senior she was talking about yesterday. He is tall and handsome, everything I can't be. I walked to my mom's car and got in with my sister.  
When we get home i go up to my room and played bass.  
My fingers hurt since i couldnt find a pick.We didnt really have a planned dinner so i decide to eat a frozen veggie pizza,Well obviously it was cooked but it was previously frozen.I go to sleep afterwards because i am really tired  
I awoke at like 5;30 AM.I went on my phone and look for Rowena's facebook.I dont really use it anymore but it was nice to have if you have like no other contact form with someone.My fingers type in Row and she automatically comes up and i friend request her.My body finds sleep suprisingly fast and i get a good hour and a halfof sleep.  
I repeat my normal morning routine deciding to wear a band tee for against me!.Even before I came out as trans i've really liked against me!,Of course having Laura as the singer was amazing but it's not the main reason i like the band.I really like the bass and guitar its so fast paced and punk rock.  
I get to school and fall into the usual routine.Nothing eventful happens during the school day except the anouncment of football practice starting.My school takes it really seriously so the team is chosen during the summer before and they practice 3 days a week.Some people stay and watch practice mostly for hot dudes and some just like sitting on the benches.,I am both.The person i stay for is Duke Trapa,The post modern pansexual,He plays safety position and not only that the STRONG Safety so he is one of the bigger guys on the feild.I'm like 5'9 so pretty short for a dude but not super short,He is a good head above me at like 6'2.I don't know why but only other queer people seemed to notice his beauty,He looked like a standard "White boy" which i dont normally like but it was more Luke Hemmings white boy than like Nash Grier.His current girlfriend is Bekka who had dated mostly girls before him.They werent very serious but they had been on and off like all of high school.  
Before Practice starts Duke comes up to us  
"Hey ladies and single gentleman"He Says to me,My sister,Quia,and Debra  
"Hey how was your summer"asks Debra  
"Pretty good,How about you adam you had a pretty eventful summer"  
"Yeah,It was pretty good i got this reaaly cool binder"I say quia looked me straight in the eyes like she was proud of my corny joke  
"Ohh i get it"Duke says after thinking for a few second  
"Well have fun at practice"Debra says to Duke before he leaves.  
"Damm that boy is hot he makes me feel 50 shades of grey asexual"Says Quia after he's far enough away.Quia's been out as ace since her seventh year and she's a freshman in high school now.  
"He is like iced tea on a summers day"I say  
"How?"Asked my sister  
"Refreshing and sweet"  
The next week is a blur of Duke.Thinking about him,seeing him at his practices, talking to him.I see my brother for the first time in a while but i'm pretty quiet.One day he asks me an interesting question.let me set the scene its wednesday and im sitting with him eating lunch,it seems like something has been bothering him.  
"Hey,Adam"  
"Yeah"  
"Me and Bekka broke up"  
"Aww that's sad"  
"Do you wanna go on a with date me,like i noticed that you seem to like me"  
"Ohhh sure,ill go on a date with you"I said excited i didnt even care that this was probobly just rebound.  
"Great tomarrow night"  
"Yeah sure"  
I spend the rest of the day with a giant grin on my face.  
The next morning i tell my mom and dad  
"Hey guess what i have a date"  
"That's good sweetie when"My mom says  
"Tonight,he's actually doing it right after school so i dont need a ride"  
"Well good luck"  
"Thanks"  
I dress pretty good to go to school since i couldnt change after school.I tell my whole group since i was so excited about my date.I see Duke in the hallway a few times and we smile at each other and he winks at me.Final bell rings and im so excited i get out of chinese class and run down the front steps to Duke's pick up truck.He came to the car and opened the door  
"I'm so excited for this date"I say  
"Me too i've kinda always had a crush on you"He responds  
"Really?"  
"Yeah I understand if me thinking you where hot as a girl makes you uncomfortable"  
"As long as you also think i'm hot now too"  
"I do,actally your even hotter"  
"So what are we doing"  
"As corny as it sounds for a date idea one of those infamous makeout cliffs."  
"Ohh well that will sure be fun"I say winking.You would think being around a super manly dude would make me have dysphoria but he could honestly finger me and i would be more than okay.  
"Well lets get going"He said putting the car into drive.He drives to the countryside like half an hour away and parks bad first a few feet fron the edge of this valley really far from any main roads.We're in a big feild with only a tiny cottage in the distance and no the cars are in sight.If you look on the other side you can see this old suburbia town  
"This doesnt seem like an infamous make out cliff"  
"Its my own,you didn't think i'd take you to a place full of people"  
"Kinda"  
"No now lets set up the back of the truck so we can look out on the valley"  
"Okay sure"(I say.He has one of those older trucks with a really hard metal frame and nothing else.He grabs this medium sized inflatable kitty pool and inflates it in the back.He opens this storage bin filled with blankets and pillows and dumps it in.  
"Do you think this is enough to be comfortable"He sys gesturing toward the mountain of pillows  
"Yeah"I say jumping into the back and taking my shoes off.I step into the pool and sit down.Duke follows after me sitting next to me and putting the blanket over our legs  
"Thanks,"I say looking over at him  
"No problem,and your welcome"  
"Do you remember that time in third grade..."He started saying  
"Be quiet,I know what your gonna say"  
"You...kissed that frog thinking you where a princess"He finishes his sentence  
"Hey that built up my immune system,and you did some ridiculous stuff back then"  
"Really what?"  
"You called your penis George until we started high school"  
"Actually i just changed his name its Harold Bernard III now"  
"Are you serious"  
"Stone cold serious"He said taking the smile off his face and making his voice monotone  
"I call mine Felicia Cause she's a fake bitch"I respond even more serious  
"Wow that reference is like 10 years old"He says allowing his face to show joy and ammusment  
"Well the person im named after is an even older reference so i guess im just out of date"I said sarcastically.I chose my name after adam from degrassi because he was pretty cool and i wanted a simple name.I'm not sure if this my permenent name i considered having a "complicated" or uncommon name like Pacific since i am half eastern asian plus it also means peaceful.  
"Maybe you are i mean being trans has existed since ancient times"  
"Ohh god no i dont like oatmeal enough!"  
"I know this seems weird but do remember that goosebumps episode where the kids ate these cookies and like became old"  
"I actually do my god that show was like psychological horror for kids"  
"I know it was like'Dont steal or you'll steal this haunted camera and all of your family will die' .It was terrifying"He says laughing and leaning on my tiny shoulder slightly.I move my head to lye on his big many shoulder.  
"God why didn't we go on a date sooner"I say to him  
"I dont know but im glad i did ask you out" he says   
"I'm glad i said yes"  
"Can i kiss you"He asks moving his head to face me  
I nodd my head and we go in for the kiss.It's awkward at first because we have different kissing styles but we find a combination that works.I take a deep breath through my nose and take in his manly scent.He smells musky but not over poweringly musky.I pull away and his eyes remain closed for a second as if he is still taking it in.  
"Your a really good kisser"He says once he opens his eyes and looks at me  
"I've had some practice"I say blushing  
"Can we do that again"He asked.He's such a gentleman  
"Hell yeah"I say going back into the kiss.We start french kissing like ten seconds in.My hand starts going to his abs and feeling the out line of eachone and the out line of the v shaped thing on his lower abdomen,thing are slightly diorted and sqishy because he is turned towards me.After i get to the bottom of the shirt i feel everything again but this time with no fabric between..I accidentally touch Duke's penis through his pants while im down there and i can tell he has an erection.He pull's away and looks at me  
"Someone's a little eager to meet Harold Bernard III"He says biting his lip.how could he be so corny and so sexy at the same time  
"No he's kinda being a a stuck up dick right now"I say trying to wink i have no idea if it worked  
"Well someone has been snooping around his property,"  
"Well its just so beautiful there,I had to explore"  
"Well come back some other day he'll be ready to meet you then"He managed to get out before we both burst out laughing.The sky was starting to get more pink and orange so the sunset was coming soon.We both leaned back and watched the sunset together.  
"Hey you hungry"He asked after about half an hour.  
"Starving i could use a veggie burger"  
"I could use a chicken sandwich,you wanna go to BK"  
"Yeah lets go"I say getting up and jumping out of the truck bed.  
We drive to Burger King and go through the drive through  
"Hello how may i take your order"  
"One veggie burger made like a rodeo burger,with pickles,and a value size fries"I say not being shameful of my weird taste buds  
"Two spicy chicken juniors and a medium Dr.pepper"  
"$8.53@the window"  
"Thanks be there soon"  
We got there during the senior rush so the drive through wasn't busy since old people can't drive well.We drive to the window and wait for it to open  
We hand the lady exact change and she handed us our food he our drink.We drove back to the field and got back into the bed of the truck.We took out our food and ate.  
"So your vegetarian"  
"Yeee"I say i mean yeah but i comes out weird because i'm kinda nervous  
"Cool,your okay with me eating meat right"  
"It's okay,as long as you don't like taste like it all the time"  
"Cool"  
The downside of having two hungry athletic men on a dinner date is we don't stop to talk much.We finish our food and look at some of the stars in the sky.Duke puts a breath mint in his mouth and offers me one and i take it.  
a few seconds after we finish our mints he leans into me going for a kiss.It's just a few short pecks and then one really long one.  
"We should probably get going"   
"Okay where do you live i'll drive you home"  
"327 Pilot street"  
"Okay lets go"  
We packed all our stuff back into the bin and deflated the pool.The drive home is long so we listen to the car radio.I get home and go right to sleep.


End file.
